You know what started the idea for this article? I won’t even waste words telling you what it is when a picture will do:
I feel like Chris Hansen from Dateline let this dude slip through the cracks on To Catch a Predator because, show of hands who wants to put up an Amber Alert on Mary-Kate right now?
But no, obviously I’m just kidding – this is … apparently.. a relationship between two adults. One young, miniature adult with a big phat wallet and a really tall, older one who is much older. so much. so…so much.
They are in love and engaged and let’s just stop talking about it because if we keep talking about it, we’ll end up picturing them having se … DAMMIT!!! #ewwwwwww
Seriously though, congrats to the happy couple.
If you haven’t seen this video on your social media channels then you probably don’t obsessively check your outlets as much as we do. (It sounds like I’m talking about conducting a rectal exam now.) Anyways, this got our cool pick because what this guy gave this other homeless guy was more than just money. He gave that guy something he probably never gets when he panhandles and that’s feeling loved. Being nice and helping each other out is always cool kids. Always.
There’s a special soap to clean wangs that’s called (not surprisingly) “Weener Cleaner.” Before you ask me if this is real, head on over to Amazon and put a few in your cart for the dude in your life. It’s labeled as a gag gift but come on, what guy can resist using this? If they’re willing to use socks improperly, (as NOT on their feet, please don’t make me explain) soap is easily a couple of steps up from that, there’s a 100 percent chance they’re going to use it. So why would you buy your man a soap he can have sexual relations with?
Because his junk will smell like a meadow. Duh.
I mostly remember Paul Rudd from the movie Clueless and Friends, when he played Phoebe’s boyfriend, Mike. But after seeing this, I will ALWAYS remember Paul Rudd when he had a Ru-Paul lip sync for your life moment on the Tonight Show with Jimmy. Paul Rudd doing Tina Turner is something that will change your life.